In the last twenty years, I have had many conversations with my mother. I have thought about her deeply but always in the context of the people she left behind – the people who were deeply impacted by her leaving the earth too early.
Over the last couple of years though as I neared the magic age that marked the end of her life, I have found myself thinking about her differently: as the person she was, not in the context of her relationships. I now can see the immense fortitude and selflessness with which she lived her last years, being so many things to so many people even though she must have been in much pain. It is a shock to realize how brave and graceful she was even when dealing with the issue of her imminent mortality. I have belatedly wondered about her desires and dreams. Like most people, I set new goals every week and like the majority, I fail to meet many howsoever simple they may seem. But optimism leads me to set them again. It is hard to comprehend how she must have felt about the dreams she knew that would possibly never have the chance to be fulfilled. She had, like often mothers do, given her all to everyone around her.
What I do realize, and she amplifies it through her short life, is that life is NOW. This is it. The time to do all that we want. The time to pursue hobbies and trips that have been relegated to the future. The time to live, to love, to build, to laugh, and to be all one has ever wanted to be.
Very true Tanu.
When a woman becomes a mother, she leaves all other roles far behind, including her own self.
We are lucky that we are part of that generation, which is steadily, albeit slowly, realising that to maybe be a better, no, actually, to be a more complete mother, we need to be ourselves simultaneously.
This is the legacy that we must leave behind.
One of your mum’s big achievements- to bring up a daughter like you. God bless!
Tanu how well you have put it. I think all mom’s personify selfless love and their biggest achievement as far as I think is to raise good human beings who in turn follow by example. You are a great mom, she did such a good job. She must be happy seeing you. God bless.
Very thought provoking tanu di. I enjoyed reading
Beautifully captured Tanu! That generation of moms are/were extremely giving, selfless and proud. Loved reading this ..
Well said Tanu. Inspiring and thought provoking indeed. Time doesn’t wait. There s never a better time than NOW.
Thank you everyone for sharing your comments. When I look around I find many young people telling their parents, mostly mothers, to go on to pursue their interests. That is very heartening too.
Very nicely written!
It is a beautiful touching piece and love the message about the NOW
So beautifully expressed Tanu! It touched my core and yet so matter of fact about the Here and Now